The Dream17 Vending Machine

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Squirminator2k
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Post by Squirminator2k » Mon Dec 11, 2006 8:11 pm

You receive an empty box, the machine having given you this in the hopes you would mistake it for a prize.

I insert an actual coin.
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kikumbob
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Post by kikumbob » Mon Dec 11, 2006 8:47 pm

You receive an identical but altogether smaller vending machine.

I insert a coin into this vending machine.
.:MatT:.

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Zeor
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Post by Zeor » Tue Dec 12, 2006 11:53 am

Due to a serious glitch, it floods the entire world. Boy, I hope that gets fixed in the next patch.

I insert a proper coin this time.
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KennyTornado
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Post by KennyTornado » Wed Dec 13, 2006 2:48 am

You receive another proper coin. Don't lose it, as it's your only friend.

No. of coins inserted: 01
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Zeor
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Post by Zeor » Thu Dec 14, 2006 1:18 pm

You recieve a chance to be eligible to have a chance at the possibility of being eligible to have a chance to recieve a chance in a sweepstakes to receive the eligibility to be eligible to have a chance to enter a sweepstakes for the chance to enter a sweepstakes to win the grand price of a chance to be eligible for eligibility to have a chance to win almost ONE MILLION DOLLARS.

I insert a coin.
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Post by Slick » Sat Dec 30, 2006 1:46 am

You get a angry aligator. It wants to brush it's teeth, but has no tooth brush. The aligator then eats you right shoulder.

I, however, insert a vending machine into a coin. Thats right.
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AndrewTaylor
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Post by AndrewTaylor » Sat Dec 30, 2006 6:16 pm

You get sucked into a larger vending machine.

I insert a coin.

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KennyTornado
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Post by KennyTornado » Sun Dec 31, 2006 2:07 am

You receive a brick which has been written on. It says "Have a good 1977, bro!", but that year has passed. You shove the brick back in, but the vending machine spat it back out at you. You would get your revenge sooner or later, as soon as you go to the dentist about a couple of KO'd teeth, which was caused by the brick!

1 coin has been inserted. I repeat, 1 coin has been inserted.
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Post by Alien King » Fri Jan 05, 2007 3:26 pm

You recieve nothing. Frustrated, you kick the machine and walk away. As you walk away, you wonder why the hell you're holding a box of dried Tea Leaves.

I, after a while, arrive at the scene and insert a coin into the same vending machine.

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kikumbob
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Post by kikumbob » Fri Feb 09, 2007 6:11 pm

You recieve a small inconspicous chocolate bar. You wait for it to do something interesting but it continues tos it in your hand and stare back at you. After a while you get hungry and eat it.

I insert a coin.
.:MatT:.

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Zeor
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Post by Zeor » Tue Feb 13, 2007 11:17 am

A genie emerges from the vending machine, complaining loudly of back problems and lousy customer service. You ask him about getting 3 wishes, and he responds by punching you, farting and stealing your car.

I insert a coin.
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Post by K^2 » Tue Feb 13, 2007 10:02 pm

You receive a cardboard box. It feels heavy. You carefully open it, and look inside. In the box you see yourself standing next to a vending machine and looking into a box. Suddenly, you get a strange feeling of being watched. You look around, but spot no one. You close the box, set it aside, and walk away, trying not to think about it.

I insert a coin on a string.
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Zeor
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Post by Zeor » Thu Feb 15, 2007 11:06 am

Another string pops out of the slot. You begin pulling on it. It resists, but does move with sufficient effort. The object on the end of the string turns out to be Kansas. You're not sure where you're going to keep it, and nobody knows what the hell you're talking about when you tell them you won Kansas on a string.

Coin -----> Machine
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Post by Squirminator2k » Thu Feb 15, 2007 11:05 pm

Something ironic happens to you!

I insert a coin. Properly.
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Post by K^2 » Thu Feb 15, 2007 11:18 pm

Machine operates properly and gives you a can of Sprite.

I throw a coin into the slot from 4 meters away. (After 27 unsuccessful attempts.)
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Post by Alien King » Fri Feb 16, 2007 12:28 am

An avatar of some strange deity appears unto you. After telling you not to be afraid, it instructs you on how to live your life and gives you a list of commandments which thou must obey. After you ignore it, it smites you with a lightning bolt and promptly vanishes.

I insert a wooden stick I found outside, because I'm poor.

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Zeor
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Post by Zeor » Sun Feb 18, 2007 2:21 pm

You recieve health insurance. This is fortunate, since you're poor. Fortunate for a month, at least, until you owe payment. Unable to find a job in today's economy, your debt to the vending machine builds over the course of the next three years until your entire life is reposessed and auctioned off.

I insert a coin.
Zero72, Team17 Forum member (and former Cartoonist), June 2002 - June 2013.

Zeor TV - [fart noise]!

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KennyTornado
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Post by KennyTornado » Wed Feb 21, 2007 5:13 pm

You receive a packet of chocolate-chip cookies, you lucky thing.

Coin inserted.
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Re: The Dream17 Vending Machine

Post by MonkeyforaHead » Sat Jun 08, 2013 10:29 pm

The hairs on the back of your neck stand up as a paradox ripples through space-time. Empires rise and fall. The planet's axial tilt shifts imperceptibly. The mass of the average domesticated corgi decreases by 0.1 grams. The star of a far-off galaxy finally collapses into a black hole, the entire four-point-six millennia of accrued culture of a dozen races now wiped from the face of existence. Nobody will ever know.

As you blink, you are awakened in a strange new world in your twilight years, your finger not yet retracted from the machine.

A can of orange soda is dispensed. You wanted lemon-lime.

Insert coin.
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Zeor
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Re: The Dream17 Vending Machine

Post by Zeor » Sat Jun 08, 2013 11:09 pm

You receive some dark matter. As it turns out, it is astonishingly dense and also extremely radioactive. We'll have to get some scientists or something to move it.

In the meantime, in full radiation protective gear, I insert a coin.
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Zeor TV - [fart noise]!

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